Hi there, I am a biologist, and I work in the new and improved field of "Intelligent Design" because evolution is a lie.
I intend to give some lectures on this blog, inspiring some sense of enlightenment in your heart.
By going through these “lectures”, you will positively help me in my aim to teach my "theories" in the science classrooms across the world. I also pray to almighty God to help me through this process.
And my hobby, smoking weed, helps me think about science too.
We at Intelligent Design believe in the real scientific methodology developed under the Just light of our lord.
We read medicine, and then, we relate it to the fact that there is a God, who created everything with his superior intellect. We see life (as it should be) in the real scientific light of his wisdom.
Now, atheists might wanna jump out of their chairs, to say "the fact that God exists, is not a fact at all".
Well, if you look at the cosmos and laws of nature, evidently, there must be a designer who planned all this.
If you ask them, Why is green green and yellow is yellow? They will say, "Oh, it's just how things are".
But my science tells me that green is green and not yellow because that's how the Lord created them.
They will whine about the logical fallacies. A wise thing to say to them in such a situation is, "Sir, please, keep your religion (atheism) out of the science, you are corrupting science with your religion (atheism)."
And now we must begin. The first lecture is on Cancer.
We shall discuss the awesome design behind the pathogenesis of cancer.
1. Initiation -
The proto-oncogenes are converted into Oncogenes by mutagens.
Proto-oncogenes are present in every cell. They control cell division, but when they are converted to oncogenes, they become abnormal, resulting in uncontrolled cell division.
Conclusion - God made our cells, as a vehicle for our soul, and the conversion of proto-oncogenes to oncogenes can be visualized as if you are driving a car on the highway with the gas pedal stuck to the floor.
There is also deactivation of Tumor Suppressor Genes.
Tumor suppressor genes have a job to evaluate DNA replication; in case of errors, it stops the faulty replication of DNA. In a pathological state of cancer, they are damaged/inactivated.
Conclusion - When we design a car, we also put a brake in the car; the P53 gene, or Tumor Suppressor gene, in this case, fails.
A tricky question. Why did God make a car with a gas pedal stuck to the floor and the brakes fail at the same time?
Well, Dear atheist, such a childish question was expected from you.
I will explain the answer and make another conclusion (because I am smart).
We were made in God's image. When we make a car, we make an accelerator and a brake, the same thing God did!
The gas pedal can get stuck, and the brakes may also sometimes fail. How can you say that it's God's fault? As if God purposefully did it! Stop hating God.
2. Promotion -
The cells are now capable of dividing like crazy, uncontrolled. But the Intelligent designer also needed to make sure these cells divide much faster. He used the estrogen smartly. As in breast cancer, estrogen helps these cells a lot.
But...At this point, the tumor is still benign; it is not cancerous or malignant yet.
3. Conversion -
For this benign tumor to get malignant, it needs more and more mutations. It's a very slow and boring process that takes years (like Leukemia in little kids) because it has to accumulate enough mutations to give the tumor some basic skills, such as the potential to invade, the potential to metastasize, and designed lethality, etc.
God has made mutations intelligent. If they were not carefully planned, the benign tumor will convert hastily into a malignant one, and the person (or a kid) will die hurriedly.
No. He wants a person to live with cancer for a while, so he can do some good work in the meantime. Earning his/her way into the heavens. Getting baptized, accepting Jesus as his/her savior. You know.
So, how do these cells invade and metastasize?
It's a brilliant process; your attention is required to very deeply grasp the elegant design of the designer.
1. Intelligent mutations give these cells enzymes, for example, Collagenase, to break away the epithelium.
2. Kedging - Intelligent mutations give these cells enzymes to kedge out of the tissue. They actively secrete enzymes for this purpose. Yes, they send chemicals out in the front, and detachment chemicals behind them.
Now you tell me how this is NOT a design? Lol! Who is a designer then? Calvin Klein? A glorified tailor? Geez.
So, these motile cells move out of the tissue and can begin their adventurous journey to the other parts of the body. They will be invading vital tissues, destroying them, and killing the patient.
Tumor angiogenesis
When the cancer cells are out in the interstitial fluid, they need blood vessels to proliferate. And when they are in a group, within tissue sarcoma, they need blood vessels of their own.
A tumor can grow only to 2-3 mm without blood supply, but for further growth and nourishment, they need blood.
They have high aims, and the Lord blessed them.
They send chemical signals to the nearby blood vessels asking them to grow into them, and the blood vessels obey. They have to, it's God's wish, my dear. God wills it.
We are now about to graduate from this class. Final questions remain. Let's answer them. They are very easy.
1. Why did God create cancer in the first place?
Well, you made him do this. It's what humans did in the Garden of Eden. Eve and Adam ate that fruit.
2. Why did God choose such an elaborate scheme?
God loves you! He loves you so very much. First, he made Eve for you so you won't get bored, then he made life so complex, so you can enjoy it and comprehend his brilliance in his design.
3. Excuse me, his brilliance in his design? Who is he trying to impress?
Oh Oh...I sense an atheist, he is not trying to impress, it's his way of showing how much he loves you.
4. So, what is the point of all this?
Scientifically speaking, we should delve more into science in the science classrooms and textbooks. We could be doing real science that actually makes sense.
Thank you, thank you very much
I hoped you enjoyed it
—-End of Lecture—
SATANIST REPLY to my original post by a jealous and hateful atheist -
"
I'm sure this is intended to be a humorous post, however, it does bring up a couple of interesting points.
Let's assume for an instance that logically there must be some sort of intelligence behind the universe. Is there any evidence whatsoever that this intelligence is the same entity(ies) defined by any of the world's religions?
The basic problem with Theistic Intelligent Design (TID) is the complete ambiguousness of it. It assigns the attribute "intelligence" without ever defining the term in any way. It assigns the attribute "consciousness" without defining it in other than the vaguest of terms. And it assigns the attribute "benevolence" in direct contradiction to known facts.
The fact of the matter is that TID is 100% reverse logic. They start with a preconception and then look for ways to make this preconception fit. The problem with this is it leads to arguments that, while sounding intelligent and logical, are completely without foundation. You could just as intelligently and logically prove that Demi Moore secretly rules the world.
"
- Teucer
Next Lecture -
Tetralogy of Fallot
Tetralogy of Fallot, a congenital heart disease
With the following features -
Pulmonary stenosis
Overriding aorta
Ventricular septal defect
Right ventricular hypertrophy
As a consequence of an "intelligent design," there's a mixing of the oxygenated and deoxygenated blood, which is being pushed in the overridden aorta
Clearly, there is an intelligent force that made this disorder possible. I mean, how could you explain 4 simultaneous anatomical defects occurring at the same time!
There are a couple of theories to explain why it occurs -
1. Diseases are manifestations of a curse or curses. There's strong evidence for this theory, for example, many people believe in it.
2. If there were no diseases, humans could never enjoy and know the importance of Good health, so they are intelligently designed by our Father, with love.
But let's not dwell on that right now. Let's just understand the design first. How can you appreciate the proper genius of an artist without even giving a closer look at his artwork? Kids die with this disease, you know! It's important.
Let's begin!
Pulmonary stenosis - It's the first and most important step. Very beautifully, God first made the pulmonary valve dysfunctional. So the blood won't properly reach the lungs for oxygenation.
Overridden Aorta - Then almighty, after finishing the first step, made it sure that mixed blood is supplied to the body, so there could be symptoms such as cyanosis, and fellot's spells in kids.
Ventricular septal defect - To ensure proper mixing of blood, the creator made a hole between the two ventricles.
Right ventricular hypertrophy - To make his plan effective, our father made laws of physics.
Whenever the heart's workload increases, the myocardium expands. If you want greater detail, you can read about the physics behind it on a tissue scale. The important thing is that it makes sure that the impure blood is properly supplied to the parts of the body.
Now, we shall explain the purpose of God behind this remarkable, mind-boggling design.
Try to understand, the best answer always is that if something doesn't make sense to us, it must have made sense to God, otherwise he wouldn't have done it.
But, anyway, the heavenly purpose -
1. So, this question can be asked under a 10-mark question in a medical exam.
2. So, doctors can have their job
3. So, examiners can get money for checking answer sheets
4. So, symptoms can be caused that show how much God loves us.
5. So, we can discover his design, his wisdom, enlighten ourselves, and praise him and love him
6. So, people like me can have a scientific theory of ID, which may provide truthful, unbiased, and non-communist education to students.
Well, the rest you can think of, it's an unending list.
—End of the lecture—
Why did God create the Poppy Plant?
Evolution is a lie; every science person knows this, but under the influence of Satan, they want to deceive you. The poppy plant and its extract – opium mimic endorphins and bind to endorphin receptors in our brain.
The fake scientists will tell you that it is by chance. They say that the poppy plant is naturally selected because its alkaloids protect it. Blah blah.
Folks, all they wanna do is to get high and spread lies.
God wants you to see the bigger picture. God intentionally made opium to fit into endorphin receptors to test your faith.
The evil biologists (under satan's influence) laugh at true scientific theories such as ours, and in laughing laughing...people get tempted to take opium for its sinister euphoria.
Satan is more powerful when people under him and around are laughing. These people fail in our lord's faith test, and they die from it. One-way ticket straight to hell for eternal punishment.
Opioids make people kill, die, and break many commandments, but it is worth it. How else can God sort out sinners from non-sinners?
Your kids give exams in their schools, think about it! It's just like these democrats say, ban assault rifles. Guns don't kill kids; bad kids with guns kill kids. Good kids with guns can prevent that...but that's our political science. Let's not get off-topic.
What other conclusions can we make? Let's go through them.
1. God wants you to get high and get addicted so later you can discover a higher power, i.e., him, and get better.
2. When kids get arrested, drop out of school, they can discover the power of the Lord by reading the Bible in jail, therefore becoming better people.
3. Parents of kids who are addicted can pray to god and thus get closer to him.
4. When kids die from an overdose, people can hold a funeral and ask God to bless the soul of the departed. It's a bonding moment.
See, God is very intelligent in all this, you fucking schmuck.
—End of the Lecture–
Advanced lesson on nutrition
Hi kids. Welcome back to our pure & holy classroom of biology - uncorrupted by the bias of communism and atheism.
Today we will start our rant, I mean research paper on enterocytes. Excuse you! Entero what? Enterocytes - these are the cells that line your intestine. They act as gatekeepers/facilitators. They absorb nutrients from the intestinal lumen and pass them to the bloodstream. Carbs, proteins, fats, vitamins, you name it, they all pass through them. Lipophilic nutrients pass through them without much effort.
But behold, the enterocytes are God's honest, hardworking children. They import specific nutrients (water-soluble vitamins, minerals, peptides, and even glucose) against a concentration gradient using energy through special channels and active mechanisms, which require them to spend energy.
But if they start taking their "cut" of absorbed glucose themselves for their own energy production, they will be like corrupt toll booths. So God Almighty said No! God does not like corruption. Hence, God "designed" (opposite to evolved) them in such a way that they let most of the glucose just pass through. Instead of using glucose, these enterocytes obtain their energy from Glutamate or Glutamic acid present in protein. That's right, they consciously made this decision (under direct directions from God). They will rather burn Glutamate, an amino acid. This is a more expensive and inefficient way to obtain energy compared to burning glucose. But they still do this. Why? It's because they understand God's love for Adam and Eve. They chose to do something difficult so that the rest of the body can obtain maximum benefits.
At this point, our atheist friend might wanna jump up and say something like “Well, had they learned to consume more of the glucose and not let it all pass rampantly unchecked to the body, maybe Eve wouldn't be so fucking fat”.
Naive non-believers. Let's dig in and put their miserable query to ease. God created Obesity out of Pure love! Every inch of that visceral and subcutaneous fat on Eve’s plus-size body represents God's thunderous and intense love for us.
So yes, it's true, many people become fat via God’s mysterious ways, like thyroid fuck up and whatnot. Some people develop dopamine fuck up - they develop addiction to food. But why, you ask? Why indeed. That's because God wanted man to discover GLP-1. But God intentionally gave this hormone a very short half-life. God wanted scientists at Novo Nordisk to learn how to make GLP-1 analogues with a half-life of days vs minutes. God wants these drugs to be patented and health insurance complicated, ensuring people who may need these the most couldn't afford them, while rich Hollywood celebrities who don't need them abuse them. Why? Oh, I would love to explain this.
You see, it's not all about biology, you know. It's also about economics and geopolitics. Even the church needs money, and so do Zionists. Humans need their wars and genocides. Lord also loves the stock market. He wants some people to get filthy rich. But why are you so jealous, dear atheist? Do you want Ozempic but can't afford it? You should work your ass off! Work hard and earn more money. It's that simple. If you just work hard enough under right-wing governments, you will be able to afford a house, a car, a wife, four kids, a swimming pool, and, of course, Ozempic. Now, are you literally too fat to pick yourself up from your bootstraps? Lolz. Let this be a warning for others. This is God's tough love, my friend. Relax, don't panic because God also loves Indians. Eventually, after elite pharma people and stockholders get extremely rich, God will allow Indians to make the same thing, and they will sell it cheaply.
Meanwhile, the entire world will learn more biology. Fitness influencers will thrive, helping or misguiding (most of the time), gaslighting you to buy their supplements. Fat positivity people will earn good money (before they themselves discover Zepbound). It's all covered under God's Big Beautiful Health Plan.
And remember, it's not all about beauty either. Obesity is not just about making you look ugly; it's more like a disability. That visceral fat is fucking inflammatory by design. Almost all diseases find their roots tied to obesity.
But nice try, heathens. You lose again. God wins. And let me know if you want to learn cool stuff and intelligent design lessons on inflammation next. Thanks for being fat.
